Obamadales

Well, that didn’t take much time. Barack Obama is already screwing things up as president. No, I am not talking about him stumbling while giving his presidential oath. Nor am I talking about how he stepped on Michelle’s dress at one of the Inauguration balls. Instead, I have a major problem with how Obama completely mishandled his entire Inauguration.

What the hell am I talking about then? Let me break down his screwups one by one.

1. For the approximately 1.5 million people who attended the inauguration, thousands of port-a-potties were brought into Washington. Now I ask, who actually paid for all these toilets? You guessed it, John Q. Taxpayer got stuck with the bill. All Obama had to do is charge a measly 25 cents (per minute of course) for each visit to one of these portable bathrooms. Not only would the cost of these toilets be re-captured, but also we could have made a dent on lowering our national debt.

2. Why were senators, congresswomen, congressmen, and supreme court justices (the two that actually gave the oaths would be excused) permitted to just sit there and watch the inauguration? Instead, they should have been assigned to work the crowd selling popcorn, hot chocolate, hot dogs, and official Obama Inauguration souvenirs. Doesn’t the term “public servant” mean anything? This strategy could have generated millions!!!

3. It is estimated that more people watched this Inauguration on television than any other show or event in world history. But did Obama insist that each guest on the stage sell advertising space on their clothing, accessories, or even foreheads (think Goldenpalace.com ads). We could have easily made millions. Think about how much money a logo on Michelle’s coat would have generated. Why couldn’t they have sold an ad on the front of Cheney’s wheelchair? I’m sure BIll Clinton would have agreed to shave the logo of a corporate sponsor into his hair.

4. Did Everyone notice the cold reception that Bush received when he was introduced at the Inauguration? A smart Obama would have took advantage of Bush’s record low approval rating and set up a dunking tank. The 1.5 million strong could pay 5 dollars for three attempts (10 attempts for $10) to dunk Bush by throwing softballs at a presidential seal target. In return for being dunked, Obama would just have to agree to forward Bush’s subscription to Mad magazine to his new residence in Texas. Talk about easy money!!

5. Doesn’t Obama realize that one of the most popular shows on TV is Dancing with the Stars? He could have easily set up a 900 number to allow the public to judge each of his dances at the various Inauguration Balls. Did he even think to set up an Ebay auction that would allow people to bid on 30 seconds of dance time with him or Michelle?

Barack Obama promised the nation Change, but certainly failed on his first day to make some real changes that could have helped put our economy on the right path. Strike one Obama

Filed under: just for fun